The new Government is almost in town. They have reshuffled, repositioned, rebranded, like rearranged deck chairs on a boat where nothing interesting ever happens. A few have left, a few have just arrived. Will anyone notice? Probably not.
Bill Shorten has reward for all his tireless self promotion during the Beaconsfield Mine collapse, Greg Combet ascends further, still riding on the relative success of Bastard Boys. Mark Arbib has…umm 'increased responsibilities', what these are I'm not sure, but his promotion has certainly 'increased' my 'gag reflex'. Rob Oakeshott has rejected the offer a Ministry, it seems Gillard saw how long he could bang on about meaningless shit at his press conference the week before and thought he'd be perfect.
Whatever the machinations, whatever bullshit factional sack tickling, we have a Government. Unsurprisingly it only took 24 hours before someone uttered the word: illegitimate.
"This Government is ILLEGITIMATE. They have literally stolen government from us" was the gist of Joe Hockey's protest, his lip quivering like a half eaten Mars bar in his sausage-like fingers. Of course this ignores that they would have formed government in exactly the same way, with the same independents, with the same horseshit promises, and with the same offers of ministries. But no "THEY ARE ILLEGITIMATE AND WE WON THE ELECTION."
Well you didn't you fat self righteous git, so fuck off back to North Sydney and honk on to a cheese sausage filled with the bitterness of opposition. And if it is somehow possible to look behind you, do so, because Malcolm Turbull is after your job.
There is nothing I cannot stand more than the pathetic bleating of a grown man denied power. This is how the people voted; this is what their representatives have decided, so suck it up bitch.
You'll get your turn in the trough soon enough.
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